Hey guys I might not be on for a little bit.

My grandma passed tonight and I will be pretty busy for a little bit. If you guys need anything let any of the mods know. Thanks

Sorry to hear about your grandma. All the best to you and your family through this tough time.

Sorry to hear about that Mark my condolences , stay strong.

First thanks guys.

Second I need to vent a little. My family is now fighting over the will. My grandma before she went into the hospital rewrote her will and left my dad with 80%. My dad is the one who is going to have to pay for the funeral and all that. Then my aunt who is also a drunk took her daughter up to the hospital while my grandma was obviously not in the right state of mind and had the will changed to give her daughter 50% and my dad 25%. Now my dad has no idea how he is going to pay for the funeral because no one is willing to help. I really want to just go beat the shit out of some family right now.

my condolences Mark, sorry to hear that, also I know exactly what you mean, same thing happened when my grandmother passed, the looney sister in the family got the will rewritten when my grandma was drugged up as well only the bitch basically took everything for herself. Hope you guys can get it resolved.

bird wrote:my condolences Mark, sorry to hear that, also I know exactly what you mean, same thing happened when my grandmother passed, the looney sister in the family got the will rewritten when my grandma was drugged up as well only the bitch basically took everything for herself. Hope you guys can get it resolved.

They better realize that I will go fucking ape shit on all of them if my dad has to pay for the funeral all by himself. That is bullshit. All he wants is the funeral taking care of. He doesnt want any money.

ya that pretty messed up, when it happened in my family I have a brain dead uncle who the family agreed would get the house, the bitch got the house and sold it.

bird wrote:ya that pretty messed up, when it happened in my family I have a brain dead uncle who the family agreed would get the house, the bitch got the house and sold it.

My cousins are good people and I am sure I can give them a call and get it settled but my aunt is a piece of work. If I have to I will get ugly about this situation.

Soonermark890 wrote:

bird wrote:ya that pretty messed up, when it happened in my family I have a brain dead uncle who the family agreed would get the house, the bitch got the house and sold it.

My cousins are good people and I am sure I can give them a call and get it settled but my aunt is a piece of work. If I have to I will get ugly about this situation.

You should make it ugly.

Soonermark890 wrote:

bird wrote:ya that pretty messed up, when it happened in my family I have a brain dead uncle who the family agreed would get the house, the bitch got the house and sold it.

My cousins are good people and I am sure I can give them a call and get it settled but my aunt is a piece of work. If I have to I will get ugly about this situation.

Without overstepping my bounds and providing any legal advice (as I am not licensed to practice in any state other than Virginia), the funeral expenses in Virginia are to be paid out of the estate. No idea the size of the estate but for most people they have a few investments, bank accounts, a home, and personal items. If a beneficiary pays the funeral expenses out of pocket, then that beneficiary would be wise to seek reimbursement from the estate before the estate is settled(for the portion that would have come from others' shares of the estate; ). Whatever a beneficiary pays, that beneficiary needs to keep all receipts, and if it were me I'd make sure other beneficiaries okay the amounts paid for funeral expenses, etc... , before executor is qualified, etc...

Who is named executor for the estate? Executor is responsible for paying expenses out of estate out of estate's funds, doing an accounting (depending on size of estate), etc... (all Virginia law, no idea of any other law).

Definitely get all the facts and make an informed decision about everything.


I won't be around much for the next few days as well.

One of my uncles died late Saturday night. Gotta hop in the car tomorrow and go out of town for funeral later this week. I sure hope my genetics didn't come from my mom's side of the family as that is her 3rd brother that died before age 55 (and none were obese or anything obvious). Scary stuff.

Sorry to hear about your uncle too Capt. Don't let it freak you out as it's just co-incidence.

captainanddew wrote:

Soonermark890 wrote:

bird wrote:ya that pretty messed up, when it happened in my family I have a brain dead uncle who the family agreed would get the house, the bitch got the house and sold it.

My cousins are good people and I am sure I can give them a call and get it settled but my aunt is a piece of work. If I have to I will get ugly about this situation.

Without overstepping my bounds and providing any legal advice (as I am not licensed to practice in any state other than Virginia), the funeral expenses in Virginia are to be paid out of the estate. No idea the size of the estate but for most people they have a few investments, bank accounts, a home, and personal items. If a beneficiary pays the funeral expenses out of pocket, then that beneficiary would be wise to seek reimbursement from the estate before the estate is settled(for the portion that would have come from others' shares of the estate; ). Whatever a beneficiary pays, that beneficiary needs to keep all receipts, and if it were me I'd make sure other beneficiaries okay the amounts paid for funeral expenses, etc... , before executor is qualified, etc...

Who is named executor for the estate? Executor is responsible for paying expenses out of estate out of estate's funds, doing an accounting (depending on size of estate), etc... (all Virginia law, no idea of any other law).

Definitely get all the facts and make an informed decision about everything.


I won't be around much for the next few days as well.

One of my uncles died late Saturday night. Gotta hop in the car tomorrow and go out of town for funeral later this week. I sure hope my genetics didn't come from my mom's side of the family as that is her 3rd brother that died before age 55 (and none were obese or anything obvious). Scary stuff.

Thanks for the advice Cap. I will be discussing this with my dad tonight. Sorry to hear about your uncle. I will pray for all your family.

Best of luck. Sorry about the bad news man.

sooner and captain my prayers are with you both..

Thanks guys. I appreciate all your prayers.

Sooner, I'm sorry for your loss as I stated in my pm to you. I'm also angry that you have to go through all this BS while your suffering this loss. I won't make any derogatory statements about your Aunt, however I'm confident that things will work out your way.

Well today was the worst day of my life. I woke up this morning with the Flu. Then I had to go to my grandma's funeral.

My prayers are with you both.

Sooner, may God bless her soul. Take your time and don't pressure yourself. It sounds like you have a great family to lean on. You should be fine.

Frank wrote:Sooner, may God bless her soul. Take your time and don't pressure yourself. It sounds like you have a great family to lean on. You should be fine.

Thanks guys once again. We spent the day cleaning out her house and now my aunt is fighting with everyone about everything. Shit I hate this stuff I just want it to be over.

Soonermark890 wrote:

Frank wrote:Sooner, may God bless her soul. Take your time and don't pressure yourself. It sounds like you have a great family to lean on. You should be fine.

Thanks guys once again. We spent the day cleaning out her house and now my aunt is fighting with everyone about everything. Shit I hate this stuff I just want it to be over.

We've all been through this. NOBODY can be at their best in these circumstances. Forgive your Aunt, she doesn't know how to grieve.

Hang in there.

marbleheadmaui wrote:

Soonermark890 wrote:

Frank wrote:Sooner, may God bless her soul. Take your time and don't pressure yourself. It sounds like you have a great family to lean on. You should be fine.

Thanks guys once again. We spent the day cleaning out her house and now my aunt is fighting with everyone about everything. Shit I hate this stuff I just want it to be over.

We've all been through this. NOBODY can be at their best in these circumstances. Forgive your Aunt, she doesn't know how to grieve.

Hang in there.

I just feel bad for my dad. He is in between his two sisters that hate each other. He is trying his hardest to do what he thinks is right but my aunt just keeps making his life hell. I myself am trying to stay out of it as much as possible.

Soonermark890 wrote:

marbleheadmaui wrote:

Soonermark890 wrote:

Frank wrote:Sooner, may God bless her soul. Take your time and don't pressure yourself. It sounds like you have a great family to lean on. You should be fine.

Thanks guys once again. We spent the day cleaning out her house and now my aunt is fighting with everyone about everything. Shit I hate this stuff I just want it to be over.

We've all been through this. NOBODY can be at their best in these circumstances. Forgive your Aunt, she doesn't know how to grieve.

Hang in there.

I just feel bad for my dad. He is in between his two sisters that hate each other. He is trying his hardest to do what he thinks is right but my aunt just keeps making his life hell. I myself am trying to stay out of it as much as possible.

Like I said, having been there and done exactly this? Just keep your Dad's spirits up as much as possible and ignore the catfight. Hang in. This too shall pass.